Time.
It is the ONE THING your pet wants from you.
Giving your time is giving affection and attention.
I heard this so many times during the sessions I conducted.
It was heartbreaking to hear how many departed pets felt their parents/guardians were too busy or that they felt they had to rally for their attention or affection.
I know it can be tough with families, careers, and well…life.
You do your best but sometimes you do not give them the TIME they deserve and crave.
Then ironically, when they leave you…
you wish for more TIME with them.
It is all we have.
Make each moment count.
Spend TIME with them now. Give them the ONE THING they want more than anything else.
Take lots of photos of the two of you together.
Life can change in a heartbeat and if there is one thing we cannot do…
but we can make each day with our furry (scaled or winged) best friend the best day ever!
If you had one more hour or one more day with your departed pet…
What would you do together?
22 Comments
The one silver lining of the pandemic is that I’ve been working from home. I’ve been able to enjoy so much more time with my cats. I’m especially grateful that I had extra time with my sweet Joey. Little did I know that this would be his last year. He was only nine when he was diagnosed with aggressive cancer and despite trying everything possible, he couldn’t be saved. I’ve always hugged my cats many times every day and talk to them constantly, but being with them 24/7 is a true gift.
Indeed, the pandemic has allowed so many to work from home. It truly is something to be grateful for! Thank you for sharing your sweet Joey with us. Sending love and healing…
This really hit home for me. I’ve had to travel for work over the last two decades and every time I left it hurt my heart. Each time I would tell my two border collie mixes, Grace and Allie, that I would be home soon. Somehow, the years flew by and now they are gone. I wish I had spent more time with them. I wish I had more photos of them. It was always such a joy to come home to those two happy faces. If I could turn back time I would let them do more fun things, silly things, I’d let them have the toys to rip apart, I’d let them run in open fields and romp around the way their breed was meant to do. I would be more focused on the and their needs. I would be a better mom! I hope they know how much I love them and miss them every day of my life. This is such a good reminder that time is so precious. Thank you for sharing, Karen.
We do our best and they know that. They understand our love. One thing that is hard for our pets to understand is why we leave each day for work. That’s one topic I struggled to explain to them. They don’t understand why we would leave them behind. Especially dogs as they are pack-oriented. Cats may react differently however, I have a few cats right now that are super needy. If I leave, they stress out. Let’s face it, they just want us to be with them. I’m sure your angels, Grace and Allie know you love them to the moon and beyond. Just keep telling them…they will hear you. Sending love and healing
If I could turn back the clock I would. Nothing can bring back my angel, Missy. I should have spent more time with her over the years. She was so good to me and gave me so much joy. I agonize about this and I am so grateful that with you Karen, I have a safe place to express my feelings. We do our best, as you said, and it is all they really want from us. More time. My new baby, Jasper, will have all of my time and attention from here on out.
I have said so many times that I just wanted to turn the clock back. Now I do my best to live fully and be in the moment with my companion animals. We have to leave for certain events or errands that is a fact of life. However, if you are truly present with them when you do spend time with them that is all they want and need. I’m so glad you are here and you found a soft place to fall. Sending love and healing to you…
I promised myself I would be a better mom after I lost my sweet Georgie cat. He was the love of my life. He brought me so much joy and was always there waiting for me without judgement and truly happy to see me. I think of all the times that I did not make him the focal point of my day and I am truly regretful for that. I tell him every day in my thoughts and prayers that he taught me so much. We only have them for a short time. Make every moment count.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your sweet Georgie. I’ve had many moments that I wish I could do over again. But like you said, we can do better from here going forward. Our pets do not blame us they just don’t understand why we are so busy all the time. They have taught me so much, like living in the moment and truly being present. I walk around my home calling out their names (for living or departed pets) and making a point of telling each of them how special they are. Share good energy and focus on the positive love you both share. Sending love and healing
Karen,
You’re an angel for posting this. I have been so distracted with work, relationships, drama, and so much nonsense….your words hit me right in the heart and I needed to hear this so THANK YOU! I am making changes right now. I am focusing on my two Pomeranians and my silly cat, Simone. They are what is really important. Blessings to you!
I’m so glad to hear this! I think we all think this…but do we act on it and actually make changes? Hopefully, yes. Even with the human loved ones in our lives. Life is way too short to spend it on things that drain us or distract us from what is truly important. Love, love love! Thank you for making that change! Sending love…
This is like a huge sign from the Universe for me to purge all the distractions in my life. I love your posts. You are so honest and straightforward. We don’t talk about this stuff because of our own feelings of guilt/remorse. But we all do it! If I could turn back the clock I would do so many things differently. I would be more present, give all of my time, I would be so patient when things were tough, I would hug, kiss, and love my furry ones so much more. Thank you for being you, for sharing your insights, and reminding us to be present with the furry loved ones in our lives. Biggest hugs to you, Karen!
The Universe will keep hitting us over the head until we get it! I know from experience! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me, Natalie. I’m so happy to be among such lovely pet-loving souls like you!
Thanks for this post. I have been very lucky that I got to spend every minute of Benny;s life with him, I never left him only briefly going to the shops and back he went everywhere with me and i am so grateful for the time we spent together, if I could turn back time and have another 1 hour with my Benny I would cuddle him love him give him lots of kisses and let him do what he wants play with his favourite toy have his favourite treat and just to see him before i make my final jorney to the afterlife when I will never ever leave him and we will be together forevermore. i love my benny Boy and i am also lucky that i get to talk to him every morning.
I’m so glad you had so much time with your sweet boy, Benny. It means everything to them! Another hour of cuddle time and playing with his toys sounds wonderful. Yes, you will be together for eternity as those bonds of love never die. Thank you for sharing…sending love
I enjoyed this SO very very much and I now realize that I CAN and SHOULD be communicating and talking to my departed boy Winston more often than I do or have been!! I feel now that he wants me to call on him with our new girl who is having some unusual ‘unsettled’ emotions for some odd reason and I am trying so hard to figure out WHY and WHERE it is coming from as nothing has changed here at all for her or our household. Her puppy days were so excellent but now we have come upon much anxiety out of nowhere and I need to try to figure it out somehow, wondering if anything has to do with him…:(
Thanks so much for your kind words. I’m sure Winston loves that you include him in your thoughts and talk to him throughout the day. Ask him to help you bring balance into your life for your new girl. They want to help us and it makes them feel good to be included. Sending love…
If I could turn back time…I would not hold onto my sweet girl for so long. Out of sheer selfishness, I was not ready to let her go. She was ready to leave but I could not bring myself to make that appointment to end her life. It just kills me now, as I look back on it. So I would turn back the clock and let her leave with dignity and peace. Please forgive me my angel, Tia. I love you. Thank you Karen for allowing me to express my burden here. I know you won’t judge me.
It hurts us much more than it hurts them. Our pets do not hold any bad feelings toward us. My heart breaks for you and if you have read my book you will know that all that matters is the love you share. I’m so glad you are here and no I will never judge you. We do the best we can and we learn from our experiences so we are better going forward. Sending love and healing…
If I could have more time with my boy Stuart, I would give him all of my attention and love in his final years. I was gone a lot of the time for work and I regret it so much. He never complained, was always happy to see me and slipped away on a cold dark night when I was gone. It breaks my heart that he was alone. Karen, does he forgive me? I feel like I let him down in the worst way. He deserved to be in my arms when he took his last breath.
I am so sorry for your loss. I’m sure your angel, Stuart has only love in his heart for you. We are so hard on ourselves when we aren’t the best parent we can be to our beloved pets. Thankfully, the love we share supersedes any of our shortcomings. Sending love and healing
I spent a lot of time with my Lexi who is now in spirit. There were years that I was distracted and spent less time that I now regret. She only wanted me and my time. That’s it. I feel I did my best at the time depending on what was happening in my life. But, during those years I was preoccupied, she didn’t know or understand why I was less available. I hope she understands now and forgives me. Now I have Henry. A 16 week old pup that I dedicate literally all of my time to. Only when he is napping do I do life things. When he is awake, I am training him or walking him or playing with him. It is a lot of work. A LOT!!! I have let many things in my life fall by the wayside in order to dedicate time and attention to Henry and making him feel at home with me. I honestly hope I’m not spoiling him with too much attention, because I will be going back to work soon, and he won’t have this much attention all the time. I’m just trying to get him settled and comfortable in his new surroundings. He seems to be adjusting well and settling in. I love him and I love the time we spend together. Can I be spending too much time with him? Can that end up causing issues later? I hope not. He has been with me a little over a month now, and I am planning on slowly spending less time so its not a shock when I’m gone most of the day. What do you think, Karen? Can you spend too much time with your dog if it can’t continue in the same fashion forever? I’m really concerned I’ve created a monster when I was only trying to do the right thing.
I know exactly what you mean. I’ve done this in the past too. It makes us more aware and more present going forward. We are here to learn and grow so as long as we are making the proper changes then we are good! It is easy to look back and see all the mistakes you’ve made but I know for a fact that you are an amazing pet parent and little Henry is so lucky to have you as his mom. I think spending this much time with him will benefit your relationship in so many ways. I don’t think of it as spoiling him. I think of it as being a wonderful pet parent! I doubt there will be issues because he will learn so much from all the time he spends with you. He will also learn boundaries and limits as you are a strong leader. I call it a win-win!